


Smaller voices

by Radi_skull320



Category: Video Blogging RPF, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, I don't know, I think writing about people I could actually run into is kinda creepy, Multiple Orgasms, Seriously I'm sorry, Sex, Sexual Tension, so I'm not sure where this came from, someone staying at your house, starting a new relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-22
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-04-27 13:18:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5050069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Radi_skull320/pseuds/Radi_skull320
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Markiplier doesn't notice he's internalized some of the youtube comments section in his thoughts.  He is offered housing while attending a convention in exchange for completing a psychological experiment.  The experimenter is the one hosting him in her home and Mark is endlessly startled by how great he thinks she is.  Will his doubts keep him from enjoying the limited time he has with her?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Awareness

He had to note to himself that the situation seemed pretty strange, but he had the security of knowing that fellow youtubers would be there.

“For science anyway.” Mark muttered to himself, looking at the evite.  Adrian Chen had sent it out to him and several other notable people in the watch-gaming scene.  In exchange, participants would be hosted by one of the research team for the upcoming convention.  The tone of the letter seemed inviting enough.

Mark adjusted the cap to cover the now fading pink hair of his as he walked into the grey building listed on the evite.  It was probably a step up from the modulars that were scattered on the Northern Virginia greens.  It was supposedly owned by the local university, since this is where the science was taking place, but it seemed so far removed.  As he entered the fluorescently lit waiting room, it reminded him of a game he had played once.  Soma, going in for research and eventually having some ill fate befall him.  

“Are you here for the study?”  A young woman at the desk caught his attention.  At least it wasn’t barren, like the game he was thinking of.

“Oh, um, yes?”

The glint of the computer screen reflected off of the receptionist’s glasses as she smiled.  

“Ah yes, another one, take a seat.  The elevator’s a little wonky so I’ll let you know when it comes.”

Mark took one of the seats in the waiting room, picking up a magazine.  Beneath it was a scientific journal with a tab on the side. Intrigued, he turned to the page immediately.  The article that was tabbed was something about neuroscience?  It was in jargon too difficult to scan easily, but he did see an A. Chen as one of the authors.

_Not subtle…”look at me and all my work”..._

“Elevator’s here, come with me.” The receptionist called to him.  As Mark entered the elevator, there was the loud noise of someone else crashing through the front door.

“Wait! Please hold it!”

Without thinking, Mark held the door open.  A young woman ran from across the room to make it in time.  

“Thanks! These elevators are either here when you need them or not here at all!”

The receptionist chuckled as the doors closed.  The woman who had entered was encumbered with a large plastic bag, a blue backpack, and a briefcase.  She flipped up  a pair of sunglasses up to reveal her eyes and blue streaks in her bangs.

“Here for the study then, yea?” She said, a little bit out of breath

Mark, who had stood a little stunned at the movement before him, found words.  

“Oh yea, I’m pretty excited.  Love brain stuff.”

“Oh good,” the woman said, pressing the button on the elevator.  “Helps if you press the button.”

“Haha oh right.” Mark scratched his neck.  Ya dingus.  He noticed that the woman was bare of makeup, clad in grey sweatpants, and looked really young.  She had a frenetic energy around her, potentially generated by large amounts of caffeine.  

“I’m a big fan by the way.” She said to the air in the elevator while she dug through papers.  “Was really glad you made it through the Fatal Frame series.”

“That one was a good one, got me with the ambiance rather than jump scares.” Mark recalled.  “Wasn’t sure that many people would watch that one, glad to hear you liked it.”

The door opened and the woman dashed out the door.  “Follow the arrows! See you in a few minutes Mark!” She called out over her shoulder.  He had to guess that she was a part of the study at least.  Maybe another youtuber he hadn’t met?

He was then left in an open hallway, with a series of signs with large arrows telling him where to go.  Some were drawn on lined paper, torn edges still there from the binding.  Other arrows were printed on recycled paper.  All of them said “Study participants this way”.  

_This still feels like I’m going to wake up scarred in a bathtub somewhere._

As he turned a corner, someone he recognized exited a room.  

“Yami!” He called out to Aaron, arms open wide.

“Mark!” His friend returned a large hug.  “Glad we all made it out!  Did you get the tickets for the con tomorrow?”

“Ugh! It was the one day I couldn’t get.  Should be slow though right? Thursdays are pretty chill at cons.”

“Yea I think it’s mostly the day that everyone’s getting in anyway.  Only a few of us made it to this study.”

“How is it though? What are we doing?” Mark asked inquisitively.

“They made me sign, bro.” Yami held up a signed disclosure form.  “It’s fun I promise.”

“Haha alright man.  Who else is doing this?”

“Not sure, but I’m going to check my phone tonight to see if people wanna meet up.  I’m not above selling my body to science, ya know?”

“Not selling, more like an exchange for housing.  Pretty cool we got students to host us at the college for the con.”  Mark corrected, trying not to feel a little dirty.

“Whatever. I’ll catch you later!  I think you’re the last of the day, maybe Adrian will tell you what’s around here.”

“They weren’t in there with you?” Mark said confused.

“No, but I did meet my host though.  She was doing the experiment on me, looking to switch it up.” Yami winked. “Later.”

_Oh you dog._

“Mark?” Came a voice from the door.

“That’s me!” He turned to see a semi-familiar face and a familiar energetic buzz.  “I haven’t been wandering around these hallways too long, have I?”

“Oh no, I’m just very quick.” It was the woman from the elevator, only she looked a little made up and was now in a blue dress and a short cardigan.  She approached him and plucked the hat from his head.  “That’s better, I just wanted to make sure.”

Mark felt the fluff of his hair get free and smiled back.  

“Adrian,” She said finally, extending her hand to him.

“Oh!” He commented, a little more stunned than he had meant.  “Pleased to finally meet you in the flesh.”  He took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“Come on, let’s get this done so you can be free of this dank place.” Adrian smiled at him.  

After completing some forms, Mark was seated in front of a computer with a mounted camera.  There were several other people there helping with the research equipment.  Adrian sat across from him, behind the screen with a colorful clipboard.  

“You’re going to be playing something familiar to you.”  She announced.  “Focus on going as far as you can.  While you play I’ll ask you some questions and do some tasks.”

Mark had a guess as to where this was going.  He always wanted to try and be mentally prepared for whatever was coming next.  The computer flashed on and the familiar theme of tetris played.   _Well this shouldn’t be too taxing._

Adrian started with asking some basic questions.  Mark answered them without thinking.  Quickly stating his name, age, birthplace, etc.  It was at the 5th level that she asked something odd.

“Now I’m going to say a series of numbers.  When I’m done, please repeat them back to me in the same order.”

“Um...Okay, I’ll do my best.” Mark said, trying to eye her over the screen.  A brief moment he saw her smile a little evilly.

“1..7..4” She called out.

“174” He said as fast as he could, barely catching a tetrino before it screwed him over.

“ 4...8...6...2.”

“4862..gah!” Level 15, by the skin of his teeth.

“Now I would like you to repeat the numbers back to me backwards.”

Mark started to sweat, as much as he wanted to look at her, tetrinos were beginning to rain down. “Uh huh.”

“5...7...3”

“3,” _Tetris,_ “7” _hold long piece_ , “5” _stupid block._

Level 20, they were beginning to pile at midlevel.  How unacceptable he chided to himself.  As if she could read his thoughts.  He caught her giggle between reading numbers.

“6...3...8...1...5...2”

_How did it get this long!_

“Uh...2” _fucking block!_ “5” _what no!_ “1” _SLIDE OVER DAMN YOU!_

His screen went grey at level 21 as the blocks filled the screen.

“UGH, 8,3,6.” Mark threw his arms up in frustration flopping back in the chair.  His hands covered his face.

Ugh what a remedial performance that was.  I know I can beat freaking tetris!

He was brought back into the room with the sound of pen on paper scratching on Adrian’s clipboard. Absentmindedly he looked her over, thinking about how nice she looked in the blue dress.  It was different from what he was thinking in the evite, he pictured someone in either a white coat or sweater vest whenever he looked at the email.  Not a girl with sun kissed skin in a dress that matched the streaks in her hair.

“Should we upload that to your channel?” She said, finally looking up at him and beaming.  

Mark remembered he was being videotaped and covered his eyes again to gather his thoughts. _Shit maybe she will think I was just staring into space when she watches this._

“Please no,” He admitted.  “That was an atrocious tetris performance.”

“Haha, well, whenever you can.  Please read this debrief and ask questions if you have any.”  She handed him a paper with a lot of writing.

“Can I say I read it? My brain hurts.  I have questions, but more for whether you consider yourself lawful/evil or lawful/neutral.

“Haha, I would have to be chaotic/neutral.  The data provides its own order.”  She collected his signed paper.  “I imagine you either want food or alcohol.  Let’s get you home.”

“ _Home_ , home is far sadly,” Then he remembered. “Oh, do you have the contact info for my host?”

“Oh? Was that not in the email?” Adrian helped him up out of the chair.  He shook his head no and started to fumble for his phone to make sure he wasn’t lying.  “Well I’m your host.  I have to run a few calculations so I can get you home immediately so you don’t have to wait.”

“Oh.” Mark again found himself caught off guard.  He had been prepared to meet and prep to talk with a new person, for some reason he thought he would be hosted by a guy. “I don’t mind waiting a little bit.”

“Um...it’s like an hour…” Adrian confessed.  “Besides, you have a con to prep for tomorrow.”

“Eh,” Again Mark found himself rubbing his head. “I have a con Friday through Saturday.  For some reason I didn’t get a ticket for Thursday.  My flight leaves Sunday mid day.”

“Oh,” Adrian looked down at her phone and looked back at him.  “Well, if you can entertain yourself for a couple of hours and let me get some work done, I’ll take you around the area tomorrow.  Don’t want you to be bored for a day.”

“That isn’t necessary-” Mark tried to explain.

“No, this means that you came down here a day early specifically to subject yourself to my science.  I insist.  Have you been around Washington DC? Like for fun?” Adrian took the clipboard and hid it behind her.  

“Can’t say I have.”  Now he wanted to know what she had written.  Maybe he would ask her tomorrow.  “I’ll call up Yami and see if he’s around.  Can I use your number if I get lost”

“Great, and of course.  I’ll get you all from wherever you end up.  He should be with my friend Janice, she’s hosting him.”

 

____

 

“Fun? Liar! You meant more like fun torture.” Mark yelled at Yami.  They sat at a nearby bar Mark took a long swig from his beer.

“Hey, I was good at it.  It wasn’t torture for me.” He patted Mark’s back.  “Did you meet Adrian?”

“Yea she’s hosting me.”

“That’s pretty stunning, you know, expectations and stuff.  Janice told me Adrian was a lady and I was like, ‘oh man, like the movies? Lady neuroscientist!’”

“She’s a psychology grad student, there’s a big difference,” Janice cut in bringing her drink.  “I really like working with her.”

“Yea, I mean getting here felt like a video game.  Couldn’t help but try to find clues about what I was doing.” He spoke to Janice directly.  “Saw her science paper in the lobby.”

“Well she should be showing off her utter brilliance!” Janice moved her blonde hair out of the way. “Did you read it?”

“Well the ‘neuro” kind of scared me off,” He admitted. “Psychology, does that mean she was analyzing me too?”

“I’d like to think it’s something they can never turn off.” Yami spouted from the other side of the tall table. “Like a super power!”

Seeing Mark’s crestfallen look, Janice tried to catch his gaze.

“I mean if she noticed anything weird, it’s not like she would say anything rude to you.” Janice sounded apologetic. “Adrian’s equally weird too.  Personal space isn’t really her thing.  I also think she’s just wrapped up in her work anyway.”

_She’s definitely going to notice on the tape. Great work Mark.  You have a whole weekend to spend with a generous host.  Try not to be more creepy._

“You all heading to Otakon tomorrow?” Mark traced the rim of the cup.

“Yea, but the panel won’t happen until you’re in.” Yami said.  “That’s not until Friday.  And you can totally hang out with us after con hours on Thursday.”

“That’s true.  Adrian says she wants to make sure I’m not bored.”

“Oh I bet I know where she’ll take you!” Janice clapped giddily.

Before Mark could ask, both his and Janice’s phone buzzed.  Adrian was on her way.


	2. Grounding

Adrian led him to the door, still struggling with several bags and a briefcase.  

“Here,” Mark took one of the plastic bags dangling from her fingertips.

“Oh right extra hands, I appreciate it.” When she opened the door, Mark was surprised at the size of the apartment.  “I’ve got a spare room, that’s why I signed up to host people.  It’s over there.  I’m on the other side.” Adrian motioned with her face to the other side of the apartment.  

“This beats couch surfing with friends in New York.” Mark said unexpectedly.

“Haha I can only imagine.  I moved from there just to pay a little less for some space.”  She glanced around, dropping a few things to the floor.  “I’d say it isn’t much, but that would be a lie.”  A grey and white cat emerged from the kitchen, meowing loudly.

“I know, I was gone for so long!” Adrian picked up the feline.  She glanced back at Mark. “You’re not allergic are you?”

“Oh no,” He moved in closer with hand outstretched. “Hey there little buddy.”

_HISS!_  And the cat swatted at him.  

“Oh, no claws, that was a warning.  Sorry, she’s a cat, they are temperamental.”

“No worries.” He said.

“Well if you wanna do your vlog or something, that room’s pretty sound proof.  You should be good.  If you don’t want Madeline here getting into your stuff, I’d close the door when you sleep.”  She looked at him gleefully. “Anything in particular that you would like to do tomorrow?”

Mark was putting his things in the room when she asked.  He peeked out the door.  

“I trust I’m in good hands.  Janice had a guess as to what we are doing.”

“She didn’t tell you did she?” Adrian looked indignant. “I swear-”

“No no, just that it will be fun.”

“Ok good.” She stood in the doorway of her room looking at him standing in the doorway to his.  Mark thought about how far away she felt, even though they were in the same room.  He wondered what her room looked like.  “Bright and early tomorrow ok?” Adrian smiled and pointed at him.  “Or else!”

“Got it ma’am.”  Mark gave a fake salute earning him a giggle and a little wave as Adrian headed into her room and shut the door.

The second room looked like her study.  There was a large writing desk and opposite to it was a full sized daybed.  It felt like a shame to undo the bed, the all pillows had been arranged into a small nest.  Mark pictured Adrian reading in perfect comfort there.  

She was right though, he should do a vlog about getting there.  He put his computer on the desk and tried to find a corner with good light.  He thought about what he could talk about, probably needed permission from Adrian if he was going to mention her or her study at all.  He decided to talk about how he anticipated hanging out in DC would be.  That sounded safe.  With that he booted up his computer and camera.

____

 

Mark awoke to the sound of someone moving around in the distance.  He was confused why his pillows inexplicably smelled like “girl” and lavender, not that he minded.  There was a knock at his door.

“Wake up sleepyhead!” Came a female voice.

Mark fumbled for his phone, he was confused as to why it said 9 am, but it felt like 6 am.  Then he remembered where he was.  He sat up and rubbed his eyes heavily.  “Yeah, come in.”

“Haha aww someone a little jetlagged? I should have warned you, I’m a pretty early riser.”

“It’s fine,” Mark’s stomach grumbled, but he didn’t want to be rude.  “Should I get ready quickly?”

“Your stomach says so.” Adrian chuckled, she was ready to get out of the house.  Her long black hair was half up with some resting on the shoulders of her sundress.  Mark looked at her a little confused.  “I don’t...cook.  It’s not a thing I’m good at.  Research and science, yes.  Making pancakes? Well let’s just say I didn’t want you to wake up to a smoke alarm.”

“So…”

“Oh don’t worry, I’m taking you somewhere.  Put on your pants and you’ll find out.”  She headed out of sight.  It took him a while to process, but just like he had been in a dream, Adrian was right in that he was sitting up in his boxers.

_ Ugh, I feel so incompetent around her.  Scientist is probably making fun of the “youtube guy” in her head. _

 


	3. Uncertainty

“It would be really cool if I could include you in my vlog.” Mark said to Adrian once they were in the car.  “I usually do a few pictures or vines to let people know what’s up.”

“Hmm,” Adrian considered, eyes remaining on the road. “I mean you have an internet name, right? Do I need one? I don’t really need people following my professional life all over the internet.”

“You could do some plugs for your research?” Mark tried to be helpful.

“Eh, human research regulations wouldn’t be ok with me going about it like that.”  Mark looked a bit sad, somehow his persona had to be useful to her.  “I had a really old youtube channel with some terrible gameplay back before I started this graduate program.  Maybe I can use that handle and I’ll be safe.”

“Oh, well that’s awesome! What was your name?”

“Please don’t laugh.” Adrian looked at him to make sure he didn’t. “Cottoneye_Jane.”

It took a while for the reference to sink in, Mark recalled it from the early 2000s.

“Wait, not to be rude, but how old are you?”

“Just turned 30 this year? why? Were you going to guess?”

“No,” The saying about “assume” making an ass of you and me popped in his brain. “You’re just...full of surprises I guess.” _I definitely thought I was older than you.  That I had wisdom to offer you or something._  “Well ok, I wanna get some of this driving scenery and introduce you.” Mark pulled out his large Galaxy phone and turned the screen towards him.  He cleared his throat and did his best to clear his head.

 

“Hi internet this is Markiplier and I’m hanging out in the Washington DC area! Take a look!” Mark wildly waved his phone around the windows of the car.  “It’s so green here!”  He turned the lens back to him.  “I also wanted to introduce my new friend and gracious host for this summer’s Otakon.  Her youtube handle is Cottoneye_Jane.  Say hello!”

He turned the lens toward Adrian and without missing a beat she looked directly into it and waved.  “Hello internet! Look who I have captive!”

“We’re apparently going on an adventure today.” Mark looked back at her.

“Oh yes,” She said sarcastically.  “I’m most certainly not taking you to the middle of the countryside leaving you nowhere to be found, muahahaha! I mean what?”

Mark offered a playful awkward laugh.

“But seriously internet, it’s a pleasure to host Markiplier.  I’ll make sure he gets to your panel tomorrow in one piece.” Adrian said sincerely while watching the road.

“You heard it! Adventure today, and seeing all you lovelies tomorrow! Markimoo out!” And he switched off the camera.  

 

“Holy cow, you are a natural!”

“Eh, I try.” She shrugged casually. “I’m sure my channel isn’t as witty as yours.”

Mark took a quick look at the vine before he posted it.  Adrian looked relaxed and content in the backdrop of her car.

_The camera loves her too?! Is this girl real? Again, I just feel...so inadequate._

“Do you enjoy it?” Adrian said suddenly.  “Meeting people? The internet fame?  I bet you meet a lot of people that way.”

“It was pretty sudden.  The internet is a really fickle thing.  I’m also subject to youtube comments section on a daily basis.”  Mark replied thoughtfully.  “Made some really great friends though, always happy to push good causes out there.”

“Yea that’s’ really rare, you’re really doing something selfless with your influence.”  Adrian caught his gaze for a while and smiled warmly.  Mark felt himself blush.  

“Naw, it’s not a big deal.” He stared at his shoes.  “I’m just a dude that plays games on the internet.”  

The car was beginning to slow as Adrian brought them to her destination.  She sidled the car up to one of the meters on Mark’s side.  

“Oh this city, always making a pretty penny.”  She pulled out her phone.  “You can pay for the meters with this app! It’s pretty cool.”

“That is pretty neat, how does that work?” Mark said, leaning in and trying to get a look at her phone.

“Just load this up and type in the code on the meter,” Adrian put her arm around the headrest of Mark’s seat pulling herself really close for leverage. “Just gotta be able to see it in the back window here.”

Mark froze.  Her cheek nearly brushed his nose as she moved her head around to get a look at the meter.  He could smell lavender as her hair moved making his stomach flutter.  Her lips were at eye level, soft in their movements as she murmured the numbers of the meter to memory.  It would take no effort to move his hand to tilt her chin toward him, to get her closer, to ki-

“See?” Adrian showed him the bright green app on her phone as she finished paying for parking.  

“Oh” Mark blinked a few times and nervously adjusted his glasses, eyes instantly on the floor. “That is pretty neat.” He prayed she didn’t notice the heat on his cheeks, he was probably a nice fire engine red at the moment.

“Tired eyes?” Adrian tried to catch his gaze. “No worries, we’re here! Let’s get you some donuts and coffee.  Lord knows I need it.”  And with that Adrian shuffled out of the car.

_I...Jesus really? No, I’m totally fine.  Don’t over think, you’re just out to have a good time! Hang out! With a brilliant, confident, funny, beautiful woman whose apartment you’re crashing at FOR THE GODDAMN WEEKEND ONLY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! She’s gonna notice...whatever...this is you’re feeling! Psychology for Christ’s sake, then it will get weird.  But maybe she won’t notice.  Maybe she isn’t even noticing you…_

“Hey!” Adrian opened his passenger door.  “Did I leave the child lock on? I do that sometimes.  Sorry! Come on.”

_ Yea like she’d notice the youtube guy who can’t even work a car door.  Great work Mark. _


	4. Subtlety

Adrian had taken him to a small donut shop, with the donut machine in the window.  They watched for a little while as a ring of dough came out of the spout and start to fry in the oil below.

“Oh my god!” Mark squealed. “They look like little poops!”

_That has to be the dumbest thing you’ve sai-_

“Oh my god right? It’s kinda cute and really awesome.” Adrian looked up at him giddily. “Come on, I’ve gotta show you the flavors!” She grabbed him by the wrist and took him inside.  He realized it was the first time she’d made physical contact with him.

Adrian gathered their donuts and coffee to a bench overlooking the Baltimore Inner Harbor.  When Mark sat down, she spanned the box across their laps and sipped her coffee.  Mark could feel her beginning to buzz.  

“Whaddya think?” Adrian peered at him over her cup.

“Delicious! Peanut butter and jelly donuts?  I need like 10.”  He visibly got peanut butter glaze on his cheeks and smiled back at her.  

“Haha oh no you have a little…” Adrian motioned to the mess on his face.  “I mean you can barely notice it anyway.” She said sarcastically.

“I’ll just use this here donut to wipe it off.” Mark said now getting jelly filling on the other side.

“Oh goodness.” Adrian giggled, picking up the napkins and standing over him while he sat.  Mark was still as she leaned in close and her eyes crinkled from laughter.  

_At least I’m funny._

After they finished the last of the donuts, Adrian nursed her coffee and motioned for him to walk with her along the edge of the harbor.  

“I know it’s a little bit of a distance, but I really like it out here on the water.” She said, walking next to him on the edge of the dock.  

Mark looked out onto the water, it was mid morning on a Thursday and there was quite the lack of people around.  

“I grew up in Ohio, lots of trees but landlocked.  It was ok, but I know what you mean.  It’s pretty serene when you have the water nearby.”

“You could pass for a surfer,” Adrian looked up at him.  Mark realized he was a half foot taller than her.  “I mean you live in LA now? isn’t that what everyone does?”  She said jokingly.

“Ah, no.  Then when would I make videos.”

“Of course,” Adrian looked ahead. “Come on, we’re almost there.”

“Where?”

“The largest aquarium in the area.” Adrian beamed.  

She led him to the line for the National Aquarium.  It was long and now she was sucking down the coffee.  

“I mean, I’m all for aquariums,” Mark said absentmindedly.

“Oh, did you not want to go? We can do something else.”

“No no, it just seemed random.” Mark searched his thoughts. “I mean, the open ocean is like right there!”

“Well how else am I going to learn about what’s out there? It’s not like I can swim.”  Adrian looked a little sad.  “I mean they work on research here and give back to the harbor.  It’s not freaking Sea World.”

_Now you’ve made her sad about the sea, great work Mark._

“What’s here anyway?” He asked searching for salvage.

“Oh! well there’s a temperature controlled Amazon exhibit with free flying birds and amazonian fish, there’s also poisonous frogs, and you can go across and see a thing full of sharks-” Adrian’s mouth was going at full speed, with a stream of consciousness for everything she knew about the aquarium’s inhabitants.  Mark was worried she wasn’t breathing.  But her eyes lit up and her hands were making dangerously dramatic gestures.  It was adorable.  It was an energy he remembered from when he started his channel.

“Hey…” Mark grabbed a flailing hand. “So breathing? You should do that at some point.”

Adrian halted all speech.  Her eyes darted between his face and her hand.  Mark immediately let go.

“Haha, yea.” Adrian said as they entered the building.

 

She was right, the aquarium was indeed huge.  It spanned three stories.  Mark took out his phone and began to document things.  Adrian walked him through each exhibit with the same familiarity one has with the rooms of their house.  They practically had the building to themselves on this Thursday morning.  She pointed out a 4 ft long rescue turtle happily munching on lettuce.  There were playful sea lions and otters in a long glass hallway.  They came across a viewing area, for a very deep tank.  Adrian pressed her face against the glass and tried to look as far down as she could.

Mark backed away a bit, the depth making him a little uneasy.  He looked back at Adrian, only able to see her silhouette in the dark room against the glass.  She had a pleasant shape, he noticed.  The sundress flaring out and coming to her knees.  Adrian looked so still in the darkness, so dainty.  Mark thought that if he put his arms around her waist from behind, he was still tall enough to rest his face in her hair.  He wanted to take a picture...

“There he is.” Adrian said against the glass.  There was a quick movement of white as a beluga whale came up from the bottom of the viewing window.  “Hi buddy!” Adrian waved at the animal.  The whale tilted his head inquisitively at the movement.  

Mark snapped a photo without thinking, luckily the flash was off.  He quickly put the phone away and came up to the glass.

“Hello whale friend! I come in peace.”  There was a clink of his glasses on the window as he made a face.  Adrian giggled.

She led them into another dark area, full of jellyfish viewing windows.  

“This is my favorite.” Adrian took his hand and led Mark to a small dome.  When he looked, he realized all the jellyfish were actively propelling their heads into the ground, only to leave their frill-like tentacles up in the air.

“They’re doing it wrong.” Mark laughed. “Someone should tell them!”

“Go home jellies! You’re drunk!” Adrian added laughing along.

“Let’s get a picture with them!” Mark added.  Adrian gave him a skeptical look. “For me, I’m not putting it on the internet.  I promise.”

“Oh alright then.” Adrian leaned in with her hands on his shoulder and smiled wide and toothy.  Mark adjusted his arm to get the drunk jellies in the background.  Her hands were warm on his shoulder and he could still smell the sugar from the donuts on her.

 

They got back to Adrian’s apartment in the mid afternoon, after she had picked up some grub for their lunch.  As she entered, Adrian picked up a nintendo DS from a nearby shelf.

“I’m beat.” Adrian sighed loudly.  Seemingly on autopilot, she walked into Mark’s room and collapsed on the daybed.  Confused, Mark followed her.  He found her lying there, he face illuminated by the screen of the DS with the familiar song of tetris emanating from the device.

“Do you have one?” Adrian said without looking up.

“I do, actually.” Mark reached into his bag pulling out a sleek blue and black DS.  

“Awesome.” Adrian patted the space next to her on the bed.  When Mark tried to lie down, it was uncomfortable, his body too long for the bed’s arrangement.

“Hold on.” He muttered, trying to lay back across.  Adrian sat up while he got comfortable and turned on his DS.  Then she laid back down, perpendicular to him.  Her head resting on his lower torso and stomach.  

“Join my game!” Adrian commanded before he could complain, not that he had intended to.

“I see where the experiment came from.” He looked down at her.  She was smiling.

“You did fine, comparatively. The baseline for tetris performance is me and I’ve won tournaments.” She looked back at her screen.  “So I’d say no one’s come close to my score.”

“Challenge accepted little missy.” Mark let out triumphantly.

“Oh ho ho! This is competitive tetris sir.  It means I send you lines every time I get a tetris.  I could screw you over so bad…”

“I doubt it, I’m pretty good when I’m not reciting numbers.”

“A wager then?” Adrian looked up at him and snickered.  “Loser covers the drinks for tonight?  Since we’re meeting up with the folks from the con?”

“Seems fair,” Mark nodded and pondered.  As he was agreeing, Adrian started the game suddenly.  “HEY!”

“All’s fair...” She trailed off as her fingertips mashed at the D-pad.

Mark felt his heart race as he mentally finished the comment.

_No, focus.  Destroy her!_

“Eat lines.” Adrian spat.  And several lines appeared on Mark’s screen.

“What no!” Mark whined, but then he found his opening. “You take them back!”  Mark could see them appear on her screen.

“Nevar!” Adrian retaliated with more lines.

However, it set Mark up for a double tetris.  As he was about to get a long piece in to destroy her, Adrian shifted her head a little south on his torso.  Mark’s pulse quickened and he over-rotated.

“Fuck!” Mark said out of mounting forms of frustration.

_Psych dude, she knows what she’s doing.  Wait but that could mean..._

Adrian sent more lines.  His screen was now 3/4s full.

“Boy you come into my house!” Adrian said playfully.

“I’m still kicking!” Mark sent her a few lines.

“Tetris to the face!” Adrian said triumphantly.  Mark’s screen went grey, he shut his DS and covered his face to groan.  When he removed his hands, Adrian was leaning over him with a smile.  

“What? Oh little old me? Offering to buy me drinks? Such a gentleman.” Adrian said in a terrible southern accent. “See you in a few.” And with that she hopped off the bed and went elsewhere in the apartment.

Mark covered his face again, processing both the loss and what had just happened.

_I should have done something in the car...I should have said something at the aquarium...God dammit I have no idea what’s going on._

“Alcohol, social lubricant, just don’t make an ass of yourself and you can probably figure this out.” Mark whispered to himself.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't ever hate on the aquarium, I love it. Drunk Jellyfish pic for reference: https://transplantedtatar.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/upside-down-jellyfish.jpg?w=720


	5. Autopilot

A lot of people gathered from the con that day.  Janice had driven Mark and Adrian to the bar that people were meeting up at.  However, once they were there, many people called for Mark’s attention and offered him drinks.  He would often look back at Janice and Adrian sitting at a table and snickering.  Mark was determined to get at least one drink to his host himself.  But streamers, cosplayers, and a handful of fans would have otherwise.

He was talking with Tomska’s team of flash animators about their book that was coming out, when he noticed a handful of teenage girls, one was wearing his Worfstache shirts, approach Adrian.  

_ It was that goddamn vine, now she’s gonna get it. _

He tried to excuse himself from the conversation for a short bit, concern building on his features as he approached the table.

“Oh he’s very nice, just not so great at tetris.” Mark heard Adrian say and the collection of girls laughed.

“You’re channel’s pretty old,” One of the girls said to her. 

“Yea it was a hobby,” Adrian replied casually. “I’m not ‘hip’ like those kids over there.” She used exaggerated finger quotes and she made sure to sound ancient.  Mark was surprised not to find her in need.  “There he is ladies, go on.” Adrian motioned toward Mark.  The majority of the herd turned their heads and darted toward him.  

“Hello friends!” Mark said, raising his hands in surrender. “You all from around here?”

He started conversation with them, but noticed that one girl was talking to Adrian very intently.  Adrian didn’t seem to mind, in fact she seemed very engaged, but he knew he would have to ask about that later.

When the fans cleared, he was finally able to sit next to Adrian for a bit.

“I’m sorry-” He began. 

“It’s absolutely fine,” Adrian patted his arm in reassurance. “They were lovely and are clearly important to you.”

“Except for one, what was with that?”

“Judgy, judgy aren’t we?” Adrian chided.  “She’s interested in my work.  She saw your vine and went to my channel from ages ago.  Recognized me and looked me up.”

“Recognized you?” 

“Adrian has given talks at several schools about mental health and videogames!” Janice chimed in.  “That’s why she wanted you all in the study.”

“Shhh, No talking about work right now.” 

 

Mark was stolen from the table a few times more and Aaron did stop by to chat with Janice.  Mark would stop by with a few friends and introduce Adrian, getting more and more sloppy as the night progressed.  At some point, the ladies exchanged a signature look and Aaron and Janice left.  It was getting difficult to recall, but Mark remembered one the distinct Irish accented Sean buying Adrian a drink.  When he saw her accept, he felt his cheeks burn on top of the flush from alcohol.  He had thoughts about what he wanted to say to stop this exchange and the smaller voices were quiet through the blur of the night.  

“I demand a rematch!” The roulette of his mind stopping on something much dumber than what he had intended.

Adrian looked up at him and around the room.  

“On...what?” She asked very confused.  “I don’t think you’re in a good state for that anyway, whatever you mean.”

“Okay,” things were pretty spinny. “But come to the panel tomorrow.”

“I...was planning on it.” Adrian said, much clearer and sober than Mark’s speech. She eyed the man next to her and he nodded in agreement.  They both rose up.  “Mark, you know Sean, he’s going to help me get you out the door and then I’m going to call an uber home, okay?”

“But  _ I _ wanted to get you something before we left!”  Sean and Adrian were under his arms now, pushing him outside.  

“There’s plenty of time for that later, I’m sure.”  

“But you let  _ him!” _ He pointed rather angrily to Sean, finger nearly touching his  _ notquitefriendatthemoment’s  _ nose.  As he began to inflate, Adrian put a hand on Sean’s chest from under Mark’s shoulder.  He took a deep breath and left after confirmation from Adrian that she’d be ok.  The cold air hit Mark’s face, but had no hand in stopping the blurred vision.

Adrian finished talking on the phone.  “The car will be here in 7 minutes.”

“So exact!” Mark blurted out.  Adrian was still under his shoulder and was gently rubbing up and down his back.  

“I try to be.” Adrian said distantly.

The car arrived and Adrian pushed Mark in.  Once she was seated and the car began moving, he collapsed into her lap.  She let out a small gasp of surprise, but resumed gently rubbing his back.

“I’m sorry Janice and you were bored.” Mark said rather glum.

“We were not and you were busy.  It is fine Mark.” She replied rather automatically.

Mark seemed to drift off a little bit, nuzzling until Adrian’s lap.  The random thought roulette stopped again and he smiled to himself.

“I thought you were gonna be a dude.” He giggled as he said the last word.

“I like being tricky like that.” He could hear the smile in her voice.

“I was, soohoo wrong, you’re so pretty.” He booped her knee.

“Thank you Mark,” She booped him back on the nose.  He scrunched his face making his glasses fall off.  Adrian caught them before they fell to the floor.  “You’re not so bad yourself.”

When they got back to her apartment, Mark started to loop his thoughts.

“I see the couch!” He stated loudly.

“Yes, but there is a bed.” Adrian tried to point him into the spare room.

“NO!” Mark shouted indignantly. “It’s your bed.”

“There are 2 beds, Mark.”

“I’m good gentleman, couch time!” And with that, he collapsed, face first into the couch.  He felt Adrian pushing his shoulder and he batted at her ineffectively.

“Just turning you on your side.” Her voice was controlled, Mark could only assume some annoyance. “Stay with me a few more seconds, Mark.”

He whined in protest.

“Do you feel sick? I’m going to leave you a water right here on the coffee table.” She took his arm and extended it to the surface next to him. 

“Kay” was all he could muster before he passed out completely.


	6. Attempts

“Hey...hey!...HEY!”

The words seemed to echo in his head.

“No, ow, loud!”

Then he felt hands grab him by the collar and shake him awake.  He opened his eyes and found Adrian’s peering at him in an apparent blaze.

“You have 15 minutes to get ready and into the car.” She spoke clearly and forcefully.  “Or we will be faced with the traffic of our lives.”

By the time he had gathered his things into the car and they had gotten onto the road, it was already too late.  The vaguely familiar scenery crawled by and Mark tried to play with his phone to not catch Adrian’s angry gaze. He dared not complain about the pounding in his head or ask about the songs on the radio.   He had already heard her curse out 5 drivers on the road, despite having the windows up.

_ Oh you really did it, I bet she can’t stand you and thinks you’re lazy!   _

That idea stuck with him, no matter how hard he tried to shake it.  And actually trying to shake it really contributed to the hangover’s grip on his brain.  It wasn’t until they were about 10 minutes away that Adrian addressed him directly.

“I can’t attend the panel,” She said looking out at the road. “I’m sorry.”

Mark slowly comprehended what she had said to him, immediately wondering if it was because of something that happened.

“Oh, was I that obnoxious last night?” He said trying to sound like he was joking, but pain was clearly seeping into his voice.

She looked at him directly, confused.

“What? No!” She fumbled for her phone. “You didn’t hear this at all? It was ringing at like 5 in the morning!”

It was Mark’s turn to look confused.

“We had a server crash in the lab.  All my dissertation data could be lost!” She looked at him with panic and fury.  “UGH of all the times and all the days…”

Mark felt a small relief wash over him that it wasn’t related to him.

_ That’s selfish of you, not everything is about you, she has a legitimate problem and you’re ok with it? _

“Oh jeez, I wanna help but I’m not really good with tech.”  He said worriedly.

“No it’s fine, it sensitive data anyway.” Adrian sighed. “I have to handle it myself.”

The car circled the large dome of the Baltimore convention center as Adrian found a good place to pull up.

“Janice has keys to my apartment, she’ll probably be the one to take you home today.  I have to make sure my life isn’t over.” Mark could see Adrian’s knuckles were white as she gripped the wheel angrily.  The car door clicked unlocked and Mark gathered his stuff.  He stood in the open door to the car and looked back at Adrian.

“It reminds me of being dropped off in grade school.” Mark smiled back at her.

“Well you’ll have to forgive me for no love notes in your lunch bag.” Adrian’s anger finally softened a small bit.  “Off with you, your fans await!”

Mark closed the door and Adrian drove off.  He wondered the last time anyone had actually received a love note in this day and age.

_____

“Dude we can’t leave here until we’ve done something for them.” Aaron nudged Mark.

It was the end of the day.  Both were very tired from the various events that required their attention, but mostly from having been on their feet all day.

“Well, how?” Mark said with a sigh.  “It’s not like we have a way to get around without them.”

They collapsed on a curb.  They had called Janice, but had at least an hour until she got there.

“I would have gotten Janice something from the con, but it doesn’t really seem like she’s into this kind of stuff.”  Aaron glanced around hoping for inspiration.

Mark did the same, hoping that something would strike him.  The convention center was not far from where Adrian had taken him last time.  He could see the harbor in the distance.  It was the flooding of people that made that day seem so distant to him.

“I feel like I’ve been here for so much longer.” Mark stated absentmindedly.

“Oh I know man, I just want to go home.” Aaron groaned.

“No, I mean not like that.” He tried to describe the feeling.  “Like, I dunno, this area is cozy or something.  It doesn’t feel like work.”

“Well you’ve got a pretty lady to take care of the house for you.” Aaron laughed.  “I dunno Mark, I constantly feel like what we do leaves us without a ‘home’, learning how to be comfortable wherever we can.”

It was a sad thought.  Maybe he would make a video about what ‘home’ was.  But for the moment he was reminded that Adrian probably wouldn’t partake in traditional gender roles anyhow. ‘I don’t...cook.  It's not a thing I’m good at.’

“Maybe if  _ I _ cooked for her.” Mark could feel himself getting excited that he had come up with a great idea. “Like a home cooked thing, something nice as a thank you.”

“Great idea!” Aaron again took a sarcastic tone. “How are we going to find or get to a grocery store?”

Mark seemed crestfallen and again looked out in the crowd.  

_ Can’t even thank her right. _

As people moved about, he saw the familiar pink shirts for his persona moving toward him.  He could feel the tension in his body as he prepared to say hello.  As they approached, he recognized someone leading them to him.  

“Hello,” Mark stood up and greeted the small collection of ladies.  Each came in for a big hug and let out a quiet squeak and then moved to Aaron to do the same.

“Hi, we saw you, last night.” The leader of the group began.  Mark sifted through drunk memories and placed her as the girl that spoke to Adrian a fair bit the night before.

“Oh hey,” Aaron and Mark extended their hands. “You could have said hello.”

“Well, most of us did.” The gaggle waved excitedly from behind her.  “I’m Abby, I was excited about other things when we last met.”

“She does seem like an exciting person,” Mark smiled.

“He’s actually spending the weekend with her,” Aaron chimed in.  “I’m staying with one of Adrian’s friends.”

“Oh man! If we had known you guys needed places to stay, we could have asked our parents!” One of the girls blurted out.

“Heh, no we don’t usually do this.” Mark rubbed his neck awkwardly. “It just...worked out better that way for everyone.  So do you guys live around here?”

“No, but we do come here a lot.  There’s a baseball stadium around the corner of the con.  It’s full of shops and things.” Abby motioned around the building.

“Oh really?” Mark shot a knowing glance at Aaron.  “Is there a grocery store or something around there? We should probably restock what we took from our hosts.”

“Oh yea, and other tourist traps.” Abby wagged a finger.  “Let it be known I warned you about them though.”

“Will do,” Mark grabbed Aaron. “See my ideas are totally feasible and not crap.”


	7. Crash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know you've all been waiting for this. I shall provide you with dirty things.

Mark texted Adrian and she had given him an ETA of about two hours, more than enough time for him quickly shower and to learn about her kitchen.  Though she claimed not to cook, he found a spice rack, some pans and trays specifically for baking, and a host of measuring cups.  Even though he should be exhausted, Mark found himself full of energy as he moved around the kitchen.  There wasn’t a dinner table in the apartment, so he had dressed up the coffee table in anticipation.  He sifted through memories of his mother’s chicken dishes and tried to make something that tasted similar.  While deep in his work, managing sauce consistency and clean up, his mind stayed quiet.

As he was finishing up, Mark heard the click of the door.  There was a pause as Adrian took a deep breath in and smiled.

“Well this is a great thing to come home to.”  Adrian peeked into the kitchen and gave Mark a quick wave.  “Do you need help?” 

“No no no out of my kitchen!” Mark said in a Ms. Doubtfire impression.  “You’ve done enough work young lady!”

When he turned to look at her, Mark saw that Adrian had spent the day in full sweats and a baseball cap.  He knew that get up shouldn’t look attractive on anyone, but it did on her.  She looked some comfortable and at home, a level of comfort he wasn’t even sure he felt in his own home. 

“I’ll be back then, I’ll at least get this wine open.”  She paused realizing it was new.  “For which I thank you sir.”

__________________  
  


“And that’s when I said, ‘10% of your brain...at a time!’” Adrian added for emphasis.  “Would make you think  _ he _ definitely had 10% of a brain.”  She drained her glass.  

Mark steadied her on the couch, though he wasn’t much better.  They had long finished the spicy braised chicken and the associated wine he had found.  It prompted Adrian to grab another couple of bottles from her shelf.  She apparently had a collection behind the spice rack in the kitchen.  Adrian had started to lean on him, not that he minded.  He reveled at the feeling of her weight and warmth against him.  

“That was really good, did I say thank you yet?” Adrian said after a pause in conversation.  She looked up at him expectantly, cheek still on his shoulder.

“Don’t be silly, this was all a thank you for you.” Mark made a face. “Putting up with me for a whole weekend.”

Adrian smiled back at him.  To Mark’s dismay, she got up and grabbed the dishes.  They made a heavy clink to the bottom of the sink.  

_ What is even happening right now?!  She probably wants to go to sleep after a long day, you should leave her alone. _

“Hey, what’s with the face?” Mark looked up and saw Adrian standing in front of him.  He sat back on the couch and tried to find some words.  

“I...I don’t know.” He replied honestly

“Oh come on, try me.” Adrian tried to look supportive.

You ever just,” It had to be the 3 bottles of wine they had together, whatever was coming out was too honest.  A part of him felt like he was in the passenger seat of his own body.  “have no idea what to do next?”

“What, like in life?” 

“Sometimes.”  He was instantly distracted at how someone’s hips could be noticeable in sweats, because her’s definitely were right now.

“You know, we’re the only animal to think far into the future?  It’s the reason we have anxiety.  You can’t plan for that, no one can.”  She moved closer and Mark swallowed hard.  “While you have to be sensible, you also have to spend time in the present.  Living, experiencing, feeling.”  She touched his cheek, he should have anticipated that but his eyes were fixed on her’s.  They were lidded heavily as she moved slowly to straddle him on the couch.

His heart was in his throat, the weight of her on his lap was something he had never anticipated.  “You diagnosing me now?” Mark said in a tone lower than he intended.  The heat from her was radiating and blush dusted her cheeks.  He was making every effort to keep his hands on the couch by her knees.

“No, it’s obvious that you’ve been listening to what people think of you or what they want you to be doing.”  Her hands rested on his shoulders now.  “I think you need to practice doing what  _ you _ want.”  And with that she stopped all movement in her body towards his and remained completely still.

He blinked hard, focusing on Adrian’s wine-stained lips.  He realized he had balled his fists and forgotten to breathe.  With a deep inhale, he brought his chest to meet her’s and pulled her down, crushing her lips in a kiss.  

Mark sat upright, hands wandering and balling up the fabric of her shirt to pull Adrian closer.  She remained against him, hands tipping his chin upwards to her’s, like lifting him out of the ocean for air.  The way her lips moved with his, soft and with purpose, seemed to compliment any movement he made in harmony.  Her hands moved down the length of his back, pushing her body flush with his.  Dull nails sent sensation down his back and up again and he hummed against her mouth.  

His hands now moved Adrian’s hair, tugging a bit to expose her neck.  Breaking the kiss, Mark traced up her neck with his nose and kissed her pulse, making her moan slightly. His other free hand traced up her thigh and splayed on her butt, pulling her closer in his lap.  One of Adrian’s hands ran through his hair and along his scalp, causing goosebumps down his arms.  He looked up and their lips met again, tongues brushing past each other, exploring, tasting, needing.  His grip on her was desperate, a need to forget that he was a single body in the universe.

He broke for air and watched as Adrian’s eyes fluttered open and looked back at him.  

He wanted to say something, to comment about this.  He should.

Instead Adrian used the moment to remove his shirt.  Mark didn’t mind, how far he had come with his body was one of the few things that gave him confidence.  He inflated a bit while he felt her eyes trace him up and down.  Adrian moved in, kissing his neck close to his ears and splaying her hand against his abdomen, fingertips dangerously close to the top of his waistband.  He took a sharp breath in, sensation going straight to his groin.  Coming to his senses, he brought her face to meet his.  

When he tried to talk, Adrian rolled her hips brushing against his hardening member.  He nearly seized and his grip went to her hips instinctively.

“Well this is hardly fair.” Mark quipped breathily.

“Fine,” Adrian said mischievously. “My bedroom, if you want it to be ‘fair.’”

He didn’t need to be told twice.  He moved her legs around him and supported her as he stood up.  Adrian was impressed with how seamlessly he was carrying her.  She wrapped her legs around him and tried to distract him by running her tongue along his jaw.  Mark diverted all his focus into not dropping Adrian despite her insistent ministrations.  He deposited her on the bed and crawled over her, but dominance still reigned in her eyes.

In a quick motion, she removed her own shirt, but left her bra on.  Adrian pulled him down by the neck and whispered in his ear.

“Ok Mr. Fair, I’ve done half the work for you.  Get it off.”

With determination, Mark brought his hand around her back and felt for those wretched clasps.  As he did so, Adrian worked on the buttons on his jeans and ran her fingertips down his side.  He knew she couldn’t win here, he wanted her overwhelmed and senseless.  As his jeans popped open, so did the clasps and he cupped her breast making her withdraw her hand.  They pushed the garment aside and Mark began to kiss her chest.  He nuzzled and played with her soft flesh, worrying one nipple with his thumb and gently sucking on the other.  She was moaning uncontrollably now, changing pitch when he grazed her slightly.  Remaining there, he kept his eyes on her as he pushed his hand under her sweats and underwear, finding her warm and wet underneath.

She moaned again, sitting up a little this time in surprise.  He knew she wanted to say something, but he would not let her this time.  He grinned slyly as he ran a finger along the full length of her slit pausing at the top.

“God, yes.” Was all she could manage.

Mark made quick work of her pants and paused. Adrian was fully naked below him now, panting only starting to sweat.  He could barely process how he had gotten to this point, but all that remained was his goal of leaving her incoherent, like she did to him.  He parted her legs and dove between them, gently peppering her inner thighs with kisses.  He then made the same experimental motion from earlier with his tongue.  

Mark felt her legs tremble as he explored between folds.  Spreading her wider and exposing her to him.  He found her sensitive bud and lavished it with attention, earning him more lovely noises  The sounds she was making as he explored her with his tongue all drove his desire for more.  Her heat and his breath started to fog up his glasses, in frustration he tossed them across the room.  Free of obstacles, he pushed his lips flush with her skin and moved with renewed vigor.  Adrian arched up off the sheets now, moving one hand into his hair.

“Mark, yes there!” Her breath hitched and she lost control of her hips as they moved against him.  He heard her cry out but didn’t want to stop.  Adrian had to yank his head away from her.  He looked down to watch the last rhythms of pleasure twitch on her skin.

She then gave him a satisfied, yet inquisitive look.

“I had to be sure.” Mark smiled at her.  She smiled weakly and glanced down at him as he stood up.

“Get those off.” She demanded between breaths.

Mark, finally free of all clothing, rejoined Adrian on the bed.  She caught his hips between his knees and locked him over her.  With one hand, she began to slowly stroke him.  Mark whined sweetly and closed his eyes at the sensation.  His cock had been neglected when he was caught up in his goals.  When he opened his eyes and looked back into her’s, he saw the determination in her face as she moved her arm.  It took some focus but he retracted from her grasp.  

“Oh no you don’t.” He said playfully as he grabbed her hips and dragged her towards him.  Adrian only bit her lip and smiled in response.  Mark then brushed the head along her opening, still slick from earlier.  He just wanted to barrel in, but felt hesitant.  He looked back to Adrian’s face with a question, and she nodded quickly in response.

He pushed in slowly, exhaling to keep calm in the process.  It all felt so wonderful, the whole of Adrian sliding around him.  He made it to halfway in and Adrian gasped.

“Sorry, just give me a minute.” Mark felt her trying to relax around him.  When he was fully engulfed by her, he had to pause.  He felt he could come just then, enveloped by her warmth.  But as he looked back at her, with her crafty grin, he began a steady pace. 

“Oh yes.” Adrian threw her head back as he began to pound away.  She put her arms around him and pulled him tight leaving him breathing hard near her hair.  Then he felt heavenly as something deep seemed to be coaxing him to orgasm quicker than before.  His hips stuttered and he pushed up to look down at her.  Her face was completely clear and she was looking smug.

“You’re doing that?” Adrian answered by tightening her muscles around him, earning her a groan. While he felt lucky to encounter someone with that much control, there was no way he was coming on her terms.  He donned a grin of his own and experimentally pushed Adrian’s knees to her shoulders.  She showed no signs of discomfort, but only mild confusion.  Mark gave a quick thrust in the new position.

The sound Adrian made in response was completely unrestrained.  Mark, with new energy, picked up the pace and pistoned into her.  Openly gasping for air and calling out to him by name, Adrian tried to ground herself by balling the sheets in her palms.  Mark could feel her twitching uncontrollably now.

“Mark! I can’t!...Oh god, I’m going to…” Adrian cried out.

She arched her back off the bed and let out a silent cry.  The convulsions were intense leaving Mark only seconds.  

“Adrian…” Mark let out a low sound as he pulled out and made a mess on her stomach.  

He collapsed beside her, placing his hand in her’s while they laid on their backs and caught their breath.  There was a sound of light fumbling as Adrian grabbed a mess of tissues from her nightstand and offered him some.  Once finally clean, Mark snaked an arm under Adrian and pulled her into him.  She lay there in the crook of his shoulder, incapable of moving on her own.  

“Such an eventful weekend,” Adrian said finally.  She turned his face to her to land a warm kiss.

“Yea,” Mark smiled and kissed the top of her head. “Not complaining though.”

“Nope.” And with that they both passed out. 


	8. Awake

Saturday was always the busiest day at cons, but it seemed to be flying by to Mark.  Adrian was able to come this time, she and Janice were off while the youtubers were stuck at a booth.  

“Hellooo!” Aaron’s hand flew in front of Mark’s vision. “Anyone in there? Can’t hold a conversation with you at all today.”

Mark looked back at him and smiled.  The booth had been flooded until about noon and there was finally some down time.

“You’re awfully smiley.” Aaron stated again.  “And your glasses are broken.” He said pointing at the corner junctures.

Mark and Adrian had McGuivered it to be about steady, but the white tape was incredibly obvious even at a distance.  Mark didn’t care, if was a small price to pay for…

“No way,” Aaron paused.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Mark replied, trying to keep his mouth from grinning stupidly.

“YouTube’s little angel’s such a dirty boy.” Aaron wagged his finger at him.

“Oh stop that you doof.” Mark batted his hand away.

“We do what we can on the road, buddy.” He knocked Mark in the shoulder. “I can’t blame ya and you know you can’t blame me either.”

_ He’s right, you’re just gonna leave. _

The smile faded gradually as the the whole of the booth pulled out their calendars for the next project they would be working on together.  It slowly consumed the future he was mentally entertaining.  

“Well I can’t wait to see you all again.  Tomorrow’s Sunday, at least you can all have a day to yourselves.” Mark didn’t pay attention to who was talking, but the threat of ‘one day’ loomed.  His phone buzzed.

“ETA? *wink*” came Adrian’s text.  She and Janice were wandering the con. 

“Soon, gonna start packing up.” Mark replied, smile returning a bit.

“Are all you internet folks meeting up tonight? Divvy up all your earnings?”

“Naw.” Mark had a fleeting thought.  “Would like meet up with you though.  Take you to dinner before I go :)” 

“Haha we kinda have to meet ya know? I have your stuff :D” Mark smacked his forehead at her response. “But I would like that.”  

 

_____________

“I’m always pleased when we can be outside.” Adrian said from across the table.  She had put on a nice dress and let her sweater hang off of her shoulders.  She was looking up at the night sky and smiling. 

Mark glanced around.  They were at a small pizza place sitting in the back yard.  Typical picnic tables were covered in cloth and colored Christmas lights were strung from the rafters.  He had wanted something nicer…

“It’s interesting.” He tried to pick up his tone.

“I love it here, silly.”  Adrian looked at him, quickly scanning him from top to bottom. “They are legit and lovely people.”  Mark wore his signature red flannel and kept his glasses off since they were broken.  His foot was absently tapping away.

_ You’re supposed to be nervous before you sleep with someone, not after. _

“Good haul?” She said suddenly.

“Oh yea Saturdays are always the busiest at cons.” He pulled his hands out of his pockets and leaned on the table, trying to direct his nervous energy.  One of his hands began to tap on the table.  He stared at it, trying to will it to stop.  Adrian put her hand on his.  

“Hey,” She said, smiling at him gently. “What’s up?”

“Heh, what gave me away.” Mark said sarcastically, interlacing with her fingers.

“You’ve been on your feet all day, you should be tired.  Instead you’re vibrating worse than I do after I’ve had my morning coffee.”

He looked at her, Adrian’s eyes warm with concern.  

_ This is why you don’t do this Mark, this is why you CAN’T do this. _

“I…” Mark looked down again and ran his thumb over the soft knuckles resting on his hand.  “Could...this weekend mean something to you?”

Adrian’s jaw dropped visibly, letting barely audible sounds come out.  Mark could feel her fighting to jerk her hand out of his.  She looked every which way except at him. Forcing her mouth shut she looked at her hand still in his.

“It’s...truly odd to not know the right words to say.  I’ve studied so long to never feel this way.”  Mark tried to catch her eyes, but they were fixated while she laughed a bit to herself and then quieted.

“Mark,” She uttered finally looking at him but still trying to monitor her tone.  “You are, clearly, a fantastic person.”  Mark puffed a bit, but he knew terrible things were going to follow.  “I’m not discounting that if a slew of things were different that there could be something here.  But they are what they are.  Deluding myself, or even letting you, into thinking this could work would just be...irresponsible.”

It was a very VERY sensible answer, he shouldn’t have expected anything else from a scientist.  Her tone was metered and he could tell she had some similar conversations before.  

_ I bet she gets this all the time, why would I think I could be different? _

“I guess I just...I mean.” Images of the endless of attempts to synchronize schedules for work alone frustrated him. “You know...we…”

“Have the beginnings of something unique together, I know.” Adrian tried to help. “I was hoping to do something similar tonight.” Mark couldn’t help the smile tugging at his lips despite feeling sad.  “But I understand if you’d rather have things discussed.”  

He appeared to be visibly wrestling with whether or not he wanted to discuss things.  She had made it pretty clear.  ‘Making it work’ would mean one or both people giving up something important to them.  

_ Only someone awful would even suggest that. _

She leaned in close on the table making sure to catch his eyes.  He could smell the lavender from her.  It was so soothing.

“I am here with you, now.  As long as I can be.”  She touched his cheek.  “I don’t expect any more or less than the same from you.  Ok?”

He kissed her, soft and sober.  He pulled away to watch her eyes flutter open.  The view was as lovely as he had hoped.

_ Here and now.  I will make you remember me. _


	9. Dream

The moment they were both inside and the door to the apartment was shut, Mark pinned Adrian to the wall.  One large hand cupped her face and the other settled on the small of her back.  He hovered above her, noses and foreheads touching.  He needed to remember everything, her warmth, her smell, her softness, but most of all the way her presence quieted the smaller voices of doubt.  Adrian snaked her arms over his shoulders and rested them on the flannel. He broke their moment and kissed her gently first and then roughly with the desire to consume her.  

He could feel her pushing back, leading them to the room he was staying in.  He likened this lost feeling to the dramatic chaos of the world and the peace of their connection like the eye of the storm.  There was the touch of her fingertips as they found their way around his shirt to remove it and he returned in kind, trying to remove her dress.  His knees gave out as they hit the edge of the bed and he landed there half naked.  Eyes opened just in time to see Adrian remove what clothing was left on herself.  He followed suit and added to the pile on the floor.  

Pushing him back slowly, Adrian crawled over him.  Her eyes seemed to be tracing his naked form to memory.  Mark laid back on his elbows to watch Adrian as she excited him with her warm breath.  His mind blank as she ran her tongue along his full length.  He fought not to fall back entirely as she took all of him into her mouth. Though he was clearly loving every minute of her work, Mark did feel that she was very far away.  He wanted to tell her to stop and come closer, but when she started to hum with his length in her mouth, words failed him.  

There was a pop as she let go, her hands now rested on his shoulders.  Feeling entirely too passive in this process, Mark swept her so that they changed places.  Stunned, Adrian now lay on the bed and looked up and him.  He began to assault her with kisses and nips at her lip while his hand massaged at her chest.  Accepting her new position, Adrian ran her fingers through his hair as he sucked a possessive mark on her neck.  His fingernails traced lightly to her hip so he could grind on her.  Adrian worked to leave a similar bruise on him, low on his collarbone.  He pulled away to catch her eyes.  She wore her familiar smirk while admiring what she had done.  

“All’s fair.” She said slyly.

“Oh really?” Mark chided as fingers found her clit.  

She gasped in surprise and pleasure beneath him.  She threw her legs around his waist to pull him closer, hoping he would get the hint.  But Mark did not let up until he saw the slyness leave her eyes.  When she let out a frustrated whine, he stopped to kiss her.  Not breaking their contact, he pushed into her effortlessly and completely.  He swallowed the sound of her relief only breaking away to gasp desperately as he found his pace.  

There was no way for them to be closer now.  Her nails on his back, his hand her hip, her legs around his waist, the chorus of their sounds of desperation and satisfaction.  

Adrian’s breath hitched in surprise and pleasure.  Mark sped up, not wanting to let her down.  She clawed at him desperately, brows knit in concentration, holding on to the fleeting feeling.  Quickly he scooped her hips up to change their angle.  The feeling was no longer fleeting but building causing Adrian's breathing to become unsteady.  Mark whined and cursed, desperately trying to hold on amid her glorious flood of sensation.  

“Oh-!” She began shuddering all around him.  Mark focused to let her ride out her waves orgasm but her cries and tightness were too much.  He pulled out with a grunt, leaving a sticky mess on her stomach.  

They lay there, Mark’s face had planted into Adrian’s hair beside her.  He let his body fall to the side as well.  He lay on his back and snaked his arm under Adrian’s waist.  Adrian cleaned herself up a bit, but tiredly resolved to wash the sheets later.  She rolled over and gave Mark a short kiss before resting her head on his chest and wordlessly falling asleep.

 

It was late into the night when he woke up again.  His flight didn’t call for early waking, but his mind clawed at his dreams. He looked down to see Adrian resting on his chest, breathing quietly.  He ran his fingers through her hair and muttered something absentmindedly.

“Shhhhh” She said, eyes still closed.

“I was thinking-”

“I gathered.” She smiled drowsily against his skin.

“I could move my flight?”

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Maybe to, like, later in the day?”

“You’re doing very well for yourself, but a few hours is not worth that airport hassle.” She said a little more coherent.

“I would be for you.”

“Heh, you say that now.” She looked at him now, cracking open one eye just enough. “Don’t ruin the story of this adventure with that sort of struggle.  End it with something nice, like writing a good skit and eating a warm cinnabon.”  With that she put her head back on his chest and snuggled him closer.


	10. Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THE END

It had been a while since the con in Baltimore.  There had been a couple of phone calls that had ended late into the night with Adrian usually falling asleep on the phone due to the time difference.  They both got busy but Mark continually texted Adrian for about another month past.  When time eventually kept him from being as responsive as he would like, he realized that he hadn’t found her on facebook at all.  Resolute to maintain contact, Mark searched as best as he could for an Adrian Chen.  The name, unfortunately, was rather common and he found it difficult to find her on social media.  When he texted her about it, she reluctantly admitted she wasn’t up on “anything like that.”  

They tried to schedule phone calls, but either would always miss.  Mark’s popularity had exploded with new opportunities and Adrian was becoming more and more respected in her field.  It was creeping up on a year and Mark actually read through the content of their texts.  

He remembered how in person conversation felt fluid with her, effortless.  The content of their texts was slowly devolving into comments about their days, big stories, and memes.  It was disappointing.  Nothing like he thought it would be at this point.  In his dream of dreams of course, they would still have fluid conversations, naked together, probably playing more tetris.  It was winding down into the Christmas season and he was due for a break of some sort.  With one last effort, Mark googled her name and her research specialty.  After much digging, he did find her name and picture on a flyer for a short upcoming conference in Ohio.

“How convenient indeed.” He said to himself, looking to see family and her, if he had time of course.

 

He didn’t know if he would actually run into her, but he figured she couldn’t be far.  The University of Cincinnati housed a couple of meeting areas she would possibly be.  Mark was surprised to see a couple of flyers on posts as he made his way through the campus.  It reminded him of the experiment he had done for her.  There were usually many people outside roaming the campus, but the layer of snow seemed to keep many from doing so.  As he came near the auditorium the flyers had indicated, he noticed a figure sitting on the nearby fountain.  

As he approached, he saw a gloved hand loosely clutching notecards but the woman’s face was focused elsewhere.  She was admiring the fountain.  It was off for the winter, but Mark saw her eyes trace the levels of it, imagining how the water would fall.

“Adrian?” Mark said tentatively.

Out of a trance, the woman looked at who had called her name.  “Yes, I’ll be in there in a sec- Mark?!”

She lept up and embraced him, the layers of their down jackets didn’t seem to keep her from pressing into him.  Mark again breathed deep a smell of lavender and she kissed him on the cheek.  

“What on earth are you doing here of all places?” Adrian said giddily.

“Well, my family is from Ohio.  Also your flyer is available on the internet.”  Mark said quickly, producing one of the many papers around the area.

“Oh well is that so,” Adrian said, blushing. “And you happened to be interested in the research?”

“Well, you know, more interested in seeing you.” Mark smiled warmly.  He wanted to kiss her, to bring her in close and tell her how much he missed her.  He knew it was probably written on his face.

“Yea, that’s always a plus, I guess.” Adrian averted her gaze and wrung her hands together effectively crumpling one of the note cards.  “You changed your hair, red.  I like it.”

Mark was confused.  “Um, yea.  Gotta keep’em guessing you know?”  Despite the cold, he had hoped for a warmer welcome than this.

_ You crash her conference and you expect her to drop everything and run to you? How selfish. _

“Hey,” Adrian took his gloved hand in her’s.  “I’m literally about to go on.  I would love to catch up after, I mean even if it would be something you still want to do?”

The phrasing was weird, Mark looked at her a little confused.  He supposed he should stay for a little bit of her presentation.

“I mean…” Mark began.

Adrian quickly hooked her arm in his.  “Just walk me back.  We’ll figure it out if I don’t bore you to death or otherwise drive you out of the room.”

“I don’t see how that’s possible,” Mark started cheerily, holding her arm tight. “You’re just so welcoming.”

_ WELCOMING?! Lord what’s wrong with me. _

When they got to the auditorium, Adrian motioned for him to take a seat at the back of the small room.  She made her way up to the backstage.  Mark wasn’t more than a few feet away from the podium, but he felt Adrian was very far away.  His thoughts were racing.

_ I should have read the flyer so I could ask a smart question.  Or wait maybe this isn’t like one of those things.   _

His mind settled on just being happy to be there and happy for her.  Sitting was what he could do to be supportive.  

The lights dimmed and a woman from the university’s department gave a short introduction of Adrian.  A projector came on and Adrian walked out.  Mark thought about how cute she looked dressed professionally.  Adrian was now sporting a couple of streaks of grey despite her young age.  She took her place at the podium and exchanged some pleasantries with the audience while loading her powerpoint.  A title slide came on with her full name and the topic of the research.

Mark had to read it a couple of times before it sank in.  He still couldn’t believe it.  He even heard her voice booming over the audio system.

“Thank you everyone, my name is Dr. Adrian Jensen…”

From his position, the sparkle on her left hand, once covered by winter gloves, was visible to him.  

_...otherwise drive you out of the room… _

_ What do I even do now? If I leave, I’m rude.  If I stay then I’ll have to catch up with her awkwardly.  What was I thinking. _

“What I’ll be presenting today wouldn’t have been possible without the time and effort contributed by my participants,” Adrian glanced at him. “Generally something we tend to overlook, but I'd like to thank them.  I wouldn't be where I am today without the gifts of their time and dedication."

Initially Mark had felt a little sick, but her remark to him made him feel a little warmer.  He was at a complete loss about what to do.  He felt like he was sinking into the seat and gasping for air.  The seat she had motioned for him to be in was near a door but in her line of sight.  He also felt incredibly guilty for putting her in this position, he couldn't imagine giving a talk with an ex - 

_ Is that what I am? _

The question stung for a second.  He wondered if she even thought of him like that.  Like there was something there.

"Psst, hey mister red hair!" An usher was calling to him from the door he was closest to.  Mark looked at him and the usher motioned for him to come through the door.

"Um, yes?"

"She had this for you."  The usher provided him with a crumpled notecard.  On one side it was titled "opening remarks" and on the other was less bulleted writing.

_ Hey Mark.  Its an absolute joy to see you here.  Really it makes this boring talk so worthwhile.  I know you're not actually interested in neurocognitive performance and I don't blame you.  So here's an out.  I just want you to know that I meant what I said to you over pizza.  You are a fantastic person, remember that, know that.  Know it so that you can rise above the smaller voices that I can see have bothered you for ages.  Because I have no doubt that there is someone in the near future that will love you with the same intensity and passion you put out to the world. _

_ ~Adrian _

It was hard not to cry just over how much of his comfort she considered, the words she had written, and the weight of reality.  Adrian never forgot but had acted responsibly.  With a few deep breaths, Mark found the energy to hope that she was happy.  He decided not to stay for the talk.  He went home to his family and regrouped.  He planned to call her for a lunch while they were both in town.  He even wanted to ask her about the mister.  Mark looked at his upcoming schedule.  After this weekend it was busy again with skits, conventions, and talks.  He smiled and walked home.


End file.
